Baby Octopi Farms

Posted April 20 2008 11:32PM by Michael

Today, while being briefed on the history of the octopi and the Detroit Red Wings by William Thomas Burgess V, we came across a thought: Could we combine our future goals of a giant aquarium with the idea of raising baby octopi as a sort of baby octopi farm? The baby octopi I am referring to are the baby octopi you find in food, often (in my case) chinese food along with squid (one of my favorite dishes, but that is beside the point). Could you imagine a school of baby octopi swimming around a pool the size of a wall? Is a group of octopi even called a school?

My research basically told me there is no such species of baby octopi: what I have been eating are literally baby octopi. However, my research also led me to a Yahoo Question. Please read it in its entirety.

Now, my loyal readers, what would you do with a baby octopus described in the link above? Would you feed it mashed potatoes? Try to shake it's hand? My favorite response is probably the one that claims the octopus, if released back into the wild, will recognize this guy and terrorize him when it grows up.

On a slightly related note, I also pondered another question. Apparently people throw octopi onto the ice during Red Wings games, and the man pictured on the right, Al Sobotka, picks them up and whips them in a circle. According to the Wikipedia entry above, an average of 25 octopi hit the ice during a Red Wings game, and a record of 54 happened in 1996! That's more octopi than I've seen in my life. It also is rather interesting that the NHL does not permit things thrown on the ice, but looks the other way towards octopi, as per the following quote from the VP of media relations:

"Every so often, an octopus slips out of someone’s hands, and Al is right there to take care of the matter. And he cannot be blamed if, as it tries to break free from Al’s grasp, the octopus lifts Al’s arm and twirls itself in the air."

Except for in the following situation:

"In the 2008 playoffs, the NHL issued a warning that while they were fine with Octopuses being thrown on the ice, the Red Wings would be fined 10,000 if Sobotka twirled the Octopus in the air, as bits of the Octopus were getting in the ice and on the opposing goaltender."

But the question remains: What if someone didn't have a strong enough arm to get the octopi over the glass barrier? Would it land in a front row viewers' lap? Would goo fly through the air? Has this ever happened? I hope the answer to all three questions is yes.

Edit: Per William Thomas Burgess V's request, I have added the event he references in his comment.

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